I just wrote Starla. She wrote me a while back asking if we were still friends, because she hadn't been able to get in touch with me. I admit that I've been avoiding her and Jeff, and I've been more than annoyed that they've called 5 or 6 times a day sometimes.

Well, I wrote Starla to discuss something. Mainly that she still believes that Jeff is my son, in spite of a DNA test that said he wasn't. I'm not mad at her. Starla has believed that Jeff was my son since he was born. Hell, she even convinced me of it, which is one of the reasons I finally asked her about getting a DNA test, to prove it once and for all. I expected the results to say that Jeff was my son, and had already sort of started to settle into that role. I was floored when the DNA test results said that there was 0% possibility that he was my son. But at the same time it confirmed what I had always felt; that Jeff was not my son.

Anyway, Jeff talked to Mama a few weeks back and told her that Starla has said that she didn't care what the DNA tests said, that she didn't trust "Internet companies", and that she still believed that I was Jeff's father. Well, Jeff believes this, and is trying to reach out to me. I have a problem with this. Not because I find the idea of Jeff being my son to be a bad notion, but just simply because it isn't so. How can I be a friend to Jeff when he thinks I'm his father? Wouldn't that be just as unfair, to settle into that role that Jeff wants me to fill, when I'm not his father?

I'm not really mad at Starla, because I'm not really surprised. As Mama said, Starla has always desperately wanted some tie with me. I just think it's really wrong to use Jeff, and stir up the emotions that this must be causing, to do that.