Hemi Burger

Hebron, Indiana. I just finished a meal from McDonald's. Big Mac, fries and a drink. It occurred to me that when the Big Mac came out it was generally thought to be a large sandwich. Not anymore. It's dwarfed by the bigger sandwiches on the menu. Even the chicken sandwiches are enormous. Anyone else remember when a small order of fries came in a little paper pouch? And the large size was what they now call “regular” (because they don't technically have a small size now)?

I'm not picking on McDonald's. All of the fast food places are the same same way. You can't criticize them. They're just giving us what we want. Remember when they all caved to pressure from dietitians and nutritionists, and started introducing healthier foods onto their menus? You know what? Nobody bought them. That's why what remains is off to the side of the menu now.

Americans are gluttons. We thrive on excess. Why else do you think that when the rest of the world was developing sleek, efficient race cars like Lamborghini, Ferrari and Porsche, America came up with the Dodge Charger. Only an American company would come up with the Hemi engine. When the rest of the world was building Formula One race cars, we Americans were building dragsters. We don't care how tight of a turn your foo-foo car can take. We just want to race you to the next stoplight. Turn on the nitrous oxide! Fire it up, man!

People wonder why America is fat and getting fatter. Geez. It's in our natures. Look at the menu in any fast food restaurant. Sitting right up there in the featured spot is the Hemi engine of burgers. And we can't get enough.