Mama is at Loyd's funeral. I didn't go. Mainly because we didn't plan ahead. I don't have anything to wear. We didn't have any transportation. And, well, there's a list of other possible excuses. There was also the fact that I didn't much want to go, and Mama didn't much seem to want me to go. This might seem hard to explain to some people, but I've wanted to keep my distance from the family in all this. I don't know. I just don't feel like being judged on the Grief Scale.

I should have gone. But to be honest, I feel like I've already paid my respects to Loyd. I don't care anything about the rest of it. This is personal, and for me it's kind of between me and Loyd. I think Loyd was understand that. I really don't care if anyone else does.